Magic Happens When You Finally Stop Nagging

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07 Feb, 17 13:23
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Himani Khanna

Shreya knows it's Friday and Arjun will come home late. Friday's are the day when Shreya stay alone at home for almost 12 hours. Initially everything was ok, but gradually she became irritated of Arjun and his friends and would message him every 5 minutes. Eventually, simple messages turned into nagging, and abusing. It affected their weekend. Lately, Arjun started coming late from the office on weekdays, and continued joining friends on weekends as well. It bothered Shreya and made her jittery. Their marriage was on stake. I came to know about her sadness on FB. We often post quotes relevant to our feeling on FB which gives a glance of our personal life to our friends. Shreya did the same. I messaged her immediately and came to the point directly. After listening her point I asked;
"Is Friday the only day that bothers you or there is something else?"-I asked.
"Initially it was only Friday, but now he has started coming late on weekdays as well."-She said
"Can you explain?"- I asked.
"Weekdays were fine. After his arrival, we would watch TV and eat dinner together. Lately it all has stopped, and he arrives when I am asleep. I am afraid if he has an affair."-She started crying.
"You cannot come to that conclusion so fast. But have you asked him about that?"-I calmed her.
"Initially he would get angry on that but lately he has stopped answering on that."-I could sense her worry.
I called her the very moment and asked to do this experiment for one month.
"Listen Shreya do exactly what I say. I will not call you for one month from now and I expect the same from you.
Now listen to me very carefully. From today, stop asking anything which he considers infuriating. Instead ask, how was the day at office, did you find food tasty which I made for you, and etc? I know sometimes husbands tell something which hurts us from the depth, do not react and start laughing when he does so. For example, if he finds his mother's recipe tastier than yours, say just okay or tell him that next time you will call her and learn the ingredients and method. If he comes late on Fridays, let him come. You cannot do anything about it, do you? So keep food on the table and go to sleep, no storm will come if you do not get to see him for one day. Give him some alone time. Next morning, make him a bed tea and wake him. Do not pretend that you care about his lateness. He will be surprised, but just smile if he asks about this sudden change. Discuss two-day plan over the tea and get out exploring the city or weekend spots.Keep doing this for one month and then call me. If you do not see any change then we will look if he is into someone. But before coming to that conclusion, let's experiment this.
As on to the matter of Fridays, where you get bored, make new friends online. Read content which is relevant to your interest. There are so many things on the internet to keep you busy. Go shopping alone, or watch movie alone in the theatres. No mountain will fall upon you if you do some small things on your own without your husband. Try these and then we will talk."
We did not talk as per the deal. Though, I kept thinking about Shreya and her relationship with Arjun. I hope they are doing well, I would pray to God. On one Sunday morning, as usual, I checked my Facebook. A few pictures surprised me. It was Shreya holidaying at some beach with her husband. I could see the love blossomed back.
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